Friday, January 1, 2010

Dear 2010

I used to say that I was idealist - someone who believed that I could change the world, etc, etc. Then I got a little older, taught kids who came from really screwed up homes and became an "idealistic realistic." Then I lost my job and became a realist. Throw in a move back to Utah and the first semester of grad school and I've become a cynic masquerading as a realist. I hate it. It was a much more hopeful existence being somewhere in the idealist/realistic idealist category.

I want to believe people are good and that there are happy endings. I want to believe again that it's worth going through this lovely thing that we call life. 2009 destroyed pieces of those illusions so I figure you can help me believe all those things again. Not sure how, but please do it for me.

Not to be stubborn or entitled, but I refuse to do another 2009. If you are anything like it, I'm abandoning anything normal and moving to Europe. Not that I don't want to move to Europe anyway, but I'll do it in a rather rash fashion if things don't pick up.

Okay that's it. Hope you're feeling optimistic about this being your year and all.

Thanks, Jaclyn


[This is my 100th post on 1/1/10. I realize those aren't exactly alike, but I like it just the same. Happy New Year(I hope!)!!]

3 comments:

Jules AF said...

I will freely tell anyone who wants to listen to me that 2009 was the worst year of my life. And honestly, all that happened to me was gossip/depression (slash family illnesses), so I can't compare to yours. But IT WAS SO TERRIBLE. I hope your 2010 gets better! 2010 HAS TO BE BETTER THAN 2009.

forget laundry said...

worse than a bad day is a bad year! dear friend! this will be a wonderful year- It better be. you are working so hard and I admire your constant dedication to learning... something I should follow you more in. I love you so much.

Brett, Juliann, and Mae said...

This year better be good because you live only minutes away from me! That wasn't self-centered! :)